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What I See

2013 September 25

Kat Molesworth

I have a very strong memory of lying on my bathroom floor, consumed by how much I hated the way I looked. I didn’t look right and people didn’t like me because of this. My body was wrong, my hair wasn’t long and blond, I was ugly, I was fat, I was repulsive. I was six.

I felt like that for as long as I can remember. I can still hear the words people, children, teachers, family used about me. Those words dictated my self-image for most of my life.

I don’t quite know when that changed. It was some point in my early twenties, when I had moved away from these people and started to live a life of my own. I was able to love myself and people were drawn to that rather than the lonely, broken girl who didn’t know how to be in a healthy friendship or relationship.

Accepting and loving myself was a huge step in my life.

When I was asked to contribute to the What I See project my first thought was of my early life. Of looking into the mirror with narrowed eyes repeating the insults that were handed to me daily. There is so much difference in what I see now to what I saw then.

I feel no shame about my body, I see past what it means to other people to the person who lives inside it.

If you’ve not heard of the project yet please take a look at the video below to find out about it.

 

What I See Project Campaign Trailer from whatiseeproject on Vimeo. Email and RSS readers might need to click through to view.

My story stands alongside those of other women who have shared their thoughts on what they see in the mirror. You can head over there, give me a thumbs up if you identify with what I’m saying, browse the other videos and even upload your own take on the question.

Following my film it falls to me to introduce Kate Russell who speaks about being hyper-critical, being a role model and taking on the boys in her video.

10 Responses
  1. September 25, 2013

    You look beautiful in your photo! And What an amazing project, I hadn’t heard of it so thank you for sharing. With two tiny daughters I’m so conscious that my attitude to my body and body image will shape their vision of the world and I’m trying hard to work out how to be the best role model I can be. As you say, being comfortable in your own skin is magnetic and I think that’s got to be the starting point.
    Carie recently posted…Going backMy Profile

    • September 27, 2013

      Thank you Carie. Being responsible in some part for how our children will view themselves is a tipping point, isn’t it?

  2. September 25, 2013

    Awesome, Kat, awesome.
    Sandy Calico recently posted…The What I See ProjectMy Profile

    • September 27, 2013

      Thank you Sandy! You are looking so different in yours x

  3. September 25, 2013

    I usually don’t view videos when I am going through my reader – I am so glad that I took the time to seek yours out today. Beautiful and powerful. You are a very inspiring person x
    Kelly recently posted…Sound bitesMy Profile

  4. September 26, 2013

    thank you for sharing that Kat! It is powerful, beautiful, honest, courageous and inspiring. I am so glad that at some point in your life you realised you are all of those things and more…you glow. We should all teach ourselves and our children not to criticise or comment on someone else’s appearance, unless you’ve got something positive to say.

    • September 27, 2013

      I firmly agree with you!

  5. September 26, 2013

    I didn’t give you a thumbs up because I don’t relate, but I do love your video and think you are beautiful. You also have the most lovely voice, I really could listen to you all day.
    I try not to look in the mirror, I mean I do, but I never really look, there’s too much sadness in my eyes, so I’ve perfected a way of doing my make up and hair without looking too hard, it’s too frightening.
    Jeanette recently posted…Fall For Cotton Final PieceMy Profile

    • September 27, 2013

      Thanks Jeanette. Grief changes us in the same way the wind shapes a tree.

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