Under Attack

I’m writing this whilst sheltering from the invading forces. It seems that the hot weather has produced an explosion of flies who have taken up residence in my home. There are about 30 of the little buggers circling in the middle of the room and nothing I try is driving them out. If you are having similar problems, the following will be of no use to you:

• A fly swat – they are nimble, only effective when they go to sleep.
• Vacuum cleaner – you can’t suck them out of the air the buggers just swerve out of the way.
• Sticky window flowers – requires them to go near the window, not their style.
• A giant net made of Sellotape – it seemed like such a good idea….

Please, if you know how to do for them, tell me!