This evening I got an email from a TV company asking me to spread the word and even apply to be in a TV show about weight loss.
There are so many ways in which this pisses me off and it got me thinking about the ways in which people have tried to tell me that my body is not acceptable recently.
When you go through the world fat you get used to people treating you differently, assuming you’re stupid and being openly disgusted by you. By the time I was six I had already been conditioned to loathe myself and was regularly harassed at school for my body. Those scars set hard and I can’t tell you how long it takes for those words to truly be meaningless.
A few weeks ago I was abused and harassed on a train by a man who thought his opinion of my body counted for something. I can’t go into details as it is now a matter for the police but what I can tell you is that he is not the first and will not be the last.
That night I was shaky and furious but I was not shamed. And nor will I be.
Image Xanthe Berkeley for Blogtacular.
The default position for anyone who is over their ideal weight is that they must DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. And do you know what? It is none of anyone’s business except mine what I do with my body or how I live.
Do you think I don’t know about the health risks? Are you under the misapprehension that I am stupid and unable to understand how weight loss works? Well let me advise you that I do not need your opinion or not-so-subtle suggestions on how I should treat my body. If you have never walked in my shoes don’t presume to tell me what I ought to do or how I should act.
I will continue to live how I choose without imposing my views on your body – because I get that those impulses are about me and not you. How about you pay me the same courtesy?
Because I don’t know about you but I am feeling a serious fuck this attitude. I do not have the time or inclination to deal with prejudice about my body. We should not have to put up with people telling us how we should look, what we should wear, how we must behave.
I have spent too much of my life apologising for who I am and how I look. No more. I know what I’m worth even if other people are yet to catch up. I am over making excuses for who I am and how I look.
So excuse me if I don’t give what you say any heed, if I call out your prejudice or ignore your email about a weight loss show. This is me: I’m fat and unapologetic. Get over it.
I totally want you to be singing that title to the tune of Star Trekkin…
Recently Alyssa asked me to join a blog hop interview series to answer some questions and share my workspace with you.
It has been quite a while since you had a peek inside my teeny office and I thought you might like to see how it has changed over the last year or so.
Why Do I Write?
For me writing is a freedom.
To have grown up being told all of the things I couldn’t do; unravelling those teachings as an adult has made me feel free. Not only can I write but I can write how and when I want. I still feel like this blog is where I have truly found the courage to be open and proud of who I am.
What Am I Working on?
It often seems quiet around here. I would love to share more of my work with you but sometimes it just doesn’t quite fit. Here is a run down of what I have going on at the moment…
- Photography – I have several portraits sessions, product shoots and events in my diary at the moment. My camera and I are enjoying the creative burst of work this Autumn.
- Film – I am making a film about our trip to Rome this past May.
- Recipes – I have a fruity flapjack recipe and flatbread recipe which I will be photographing and writing up to share with you soon.
- Blogtacular – so many good things happening here. Meeting with potential sponsors, making collaboration plans and sounding out speakers for 2015. Lots of secrets that I will be (impatiently) keeping until next year.
How Does it Differ From Others in the Genre?
We often have this question in our weekly Blogtacular twitter chat. How do you stand out? What makes your blog different? And my answer is that it’s the writer that makes it different.
I’m not breaking any moulds here – this blog is about family, recipes and photos. It’s my point of view that sets me apart. I may not be and will never be a blog megastar but for me this has always been about connecting with other people who feel the same way I do and capturing our family life.
I would love to know why you come to visit me here, it intrigues me but I always hesitate to ask.
How Does my Writing Process Work?
I don’t think I have one process of writing. Often I’ll come to a post through long periods of thinking while other times I’ll get the coloured pens and my big book of brainstorming out and explore my thoughts that way.
I write from my heart and rarely edit once the thoughts are out on the page.
When it comes to writing recipes I’m very much led by what we are enjoying eating in the season. I let myself be guided by the fact that I write these recipes not only for you but to share with my children in the future.
How do you like my workspace these days? It’s certainly where I spend most of my time writing and editing.
I know you’ll be dying to know where the new items came from –
- The desk lamp is from the IKEA PS Collection.
- The weekly planner (hanging up) is from Lollipop and it is an absolute must for those of you trying to balance a busy schedule – the 2015 planner is ready to go on my wall!
- The yellow pegboard is from Hunkydory Home.
- The chair (which isn’t my usual desk chair, it just looked neater for the photos!) was from Metro Furniture – I wrote about it here.
Thanks for asking me to complete this Alyssa – it’s not often I examine my creative process here.
Disclosure: the pegboard and chair were sent to me.
Let me take you back to the Summer…
Luckily my friends have been gently applying pressure to cross the Solent for a couple of years and this Summer we finally made it happen.
It’s rarely that we go away for more than a couple of nights so for our children a weekend away is a holiday. The anticipation was almost unbearable for them not least because they were so excited about travelling by ferry*!
With just two days to explore the island we kept our trip simple. We headed out to one or two places, took in the atmosphere and enjoyed island food.
With a blustery day ahead of us we set out for The Garlic Farm. Having bought our garlic from them since they began selling at Winchester Farmers Market it was great to finally visit the farm.
We shared a garlicky sausage roll and some pork scratchings (eurgh – not for me!) we hopped in the car and drove over to Ventnor. The wind was so strong my skirt blew up like a parachute! Of course this didn’t bother the children who delighted in digging in the shingle and dodging waves.
Of course a trip to the sea side is not complete without fish & chips. We shared fish & chips from Ventnor Haven Fishery and picked up some fresh fish to take home for our supper. I loved that their selection wasn’t the kind of fish we’re used to seeing on a menu – the rock salmon was uncommonly good!
On Sunday the weather was a blue-skied sunny day which can only mean one thing – beach day! As we were staying at Compton we didn’t have far to go to reach Compton Bay which is the quintessential British beach with sand, rocks and the chance of finding a fossil in between swims.
I sometimes feel like words are not enough to truly share how much fun we’ve been having. I made a film from the footage I took on my phone (and a little DSLR) to share with you…
If you can’t see the video below click here to view it…
Not only was it a super fun place to spend a family holiday but it gave me a chance to play around with some night photography.
I remember my grandfather setting his alarm for 2am to photograph and eclipse when I was nine. Since then I’ve always connected holidays with a time for some creative exploration of the night sky.
Tom and I set up my camera on the tripod and experimented with different exposures. Having drooled over Milky Way photos for a while now I was thrilled to get such a clear shot within a few minutes. Not only that but we caught some meteors in the frame.
Huge thanks to the residents of Compton for turning their lights off at night so we can enjoy their dark skies!
I’m so glad I waited my whole life to visit the Isle of Wight; sharing my first visit with my favourite people made it so much more memorable.
*Our ferry crossings were covered by Wight Link for more detail please see my disclosure for readers page.
I have a fun download for you in this post, first, let me introduce you to my friend Claudia.
After Haiyan struck The Philippines last November she swung into action with a friend in a campaign to gather blankets, clothing, soap and medical supplies amongst other items and getting them shipped out.
This is despite having three children two of whom were under two at the time. I know, right?
Following the initial push for aid Claudia wanted to do something which connected with the children whose lives had been turned upside down. She developed the idea of making capes to send out as an open play toy which both delights and gives children the power of play.
Image courtesy of I Am Super Capes
I Am Super Capes was born and Claudia’s first cape mission was sent to children in The Philippines. Since then Claudia has been busy coordinating and sewing capes for children across the world.
Often the children she is sending capes to are facing the very hardest times of their lives; challenges they were born with or from which they can’t escape. I Am Super Capes gives them to opportunity to be heroes and to play as all children love to play.
Image courtesy of I Am Super Capes
I Am Super Capes’ latest mission connects with the annual toy drive held by Charly’s Bakery in Cape Town for the children 0f the Red Cross Children’s Hospital, Cape Town.
This December Claudia will be flying out to Cape Town to deliver 600, yes 600 capes and help with the toy drive personally.
600 capes is a tall order and I Am Super Capes needs your help to fulfil their pledge. There are a few ways to lend your support:
- Firstly, make a cape (or several capes, tutorial here) and send them to I Am Super Capes at the address on their contact page.
- Got no time but a stack of fabric / duvet covers / machine thread? Send the fabric to Claudia and she’ll add it to the I Am Super Capes stash.
- Donate – Claudia and her supporters are jumping out of a plane in October to raise money for fabric and notions. You can contribute by donating on their GoFundMe page.
- Finally, help Claudia spread the word. Share details on twitter, Facebook and your blog (join Nurture Store’s linkup). Or let companies you work with know how they could help, sewing machines, thread and fabric are all put to good use in the I Am Super Capes Sewing Cave.
Want to make your cape fun? Here are three printable templates to use with the Cricut Explore or simply to pin to your fabric and cut.